For my girls..
So it's midnight and I had the intention of reading one little blog then heading off to bed. But my plan was completely derailed after I read
's latest blog. oh. my. word it's like she lives in my head! If you are not familiar with Christa Black then girls listen up YOU NEED TO BE! She is an incredible musician, author, motivator, girl cheerleader, Jesus lover, and a complete stranger to me...but I love her and i don't even know her and I'm ok with that. (well no actually i think it'd be cool to be friends) but anyway.... she wrote this little book called "
" that is entirely transforming, if you are a girl then I suggest you pick it up immediately! ;) I've attached below the insightful words she has penned and hope that you will be encouraged to find peace with the way God has made you, (remember he doesn't make mistakes) and love for journey you are on.
Isn’t in crazy how much our society has changed in 200 years? For women, skinny meant you were poor, making it unattractive, and beautiful meant you had enough money to have a bit of meat on the bones. If you walk through any museum and browse the renaissance paintings, you’ll see exactly what I mean.
This girl was smokin’ hot back in Bellini’s day, with her flat chest, her pale, round bottom, and her lacking 6-pack abs.
So when did this standard change and why?
I mentioned earlier this week that I’ve been doing hot yoga. You walk into the studio, and it’s mostly women, and not one of us has the same body type. Some carry weight around their mid-section (tire around the belly, as my friend likes to call her tummy), some have gymnast bodies where everything is tight, compact, and stocky, and others are long and lean, maybe carrying more of their weight in the legs and booty. (This would be me). Some seem to be equally proportionate, and others tend to gain in certain areas. Some have natural muscles, some have huge chests, some have small. There are bigger girls, smaller girls, short and tall. You name it, and it’s in there sweating away as we endure the heat together.
Each one of us is completely different, so beautiful, so unique, with bodies and frames at different shapes and sizes. And yet, when we flip through the fashion magazines, there’s only one kind of girl: a waif-looking skinny chick measuring in about 6 feet tall.
Now, come on.
No matter how hard someone tries, they can’t ever grow inches, just like I can’t grow boobs, and my ‘tire around the belly’ friend can’t grow a booty to save her life. It’s just not going to happen. And yet, we look in the magazines, and at the girls next to us, and we compare, time and time again, to a body-type that most of us could never have, even with surgery.
Let me ask you a few questions.
1. What kind of body type do you have?
Are you one of the types I described? Do you tend to gain in your legs and thighs, or your tummy and arms? Do you have a smaller bone structure or a bigger bone structure? Do you have a small chest or a large chest? Are you flexible or unflexible?
Recognize who you are created to be, and accept it. You can change it to some extent, but if you’re short, embrace it. If you’re flat, own that chest. Accept who you are, because your structure (no matter how much you hate it) will never change, and who wants to spend their lives hating themselves?
I will never be the yoga teacher in class whose leg contorts behind her head. My hips are so tight, I can’t even sit Indian-style, for crying out loud. I will never have Pamela Anderson’s chest (without going under the knife), or J-Lo’s tight, lifted booty. Mine’s always gonna jiggle a little bit when I dance around. These are just things I’ve stopped wishing I could become, I’ve stopped comparing myself to others, and have chosen to love and accept about myself. Step 1.
2. What do you want to realistically change or maintain?
It’s fine to want to change things about your body. There’s nothing wrong with this—however—when the obsession with change is impossible, you’re shooting yourself in the foot and in for a long, nightmarish ride.
For instance, my least favorite part about my body has always been my butt. It can get a little saggy (with a few too many Chipotle burritos) and tends to crinkle up into cottage cheese cellulite. Now, I can do something about how many Chipotle burritos I put in my mouth, I can work out in ways that help lift the butt, but I will never have a butt that looks like this:
I have accepted this, so this butt is off limits for me. I’ve taken it off the table because it’s not possible for my body type. Whew…what a relief. No more pressure! I don’t have to keep looking in the mirror, obsessing over something that’s impossible!
But I can make sure I’m working out and eating healthy. I can find the normal, average size jeans I’m supposed to fit into and stay in those jeans. I can make sure my arms and waistline stay their normal trim self, and I can work out and feel the benefits of being healthy, proud of myself for taking care of my body while I’m on my short trip on this earth.
3. What can I accept and love about myself?
This is probably the most important thing you can do.
We tend to focus so much on the negative, but when we do that, more negatives are produced. Once you’ve accepted what kind of body you are, you make realistic goals to change from a positive place, now you can choose to actively and intentionally be grateful.
I thank God all the time that I’m able to stay in an entire hot yoga class and do most poses. I thank God all the time that I’m able to walk, to run, to have full use of all my limbs. I thank God that I’m able to speak, to sing, to hear, to see. There’s SO MUCH to be grateful for. Once you get started on the grateful train, I promise you, it’s so addicting, you won’t want to get off.
EMBRACE WHO YOU ARE. There are things about you that are never going to change, so why spend one more minute of your life worrying about it? Why spend one more moment wishing you were taller, shorter, bigger, smaller? Change what you can WITH GRACE, and accept and love yourself as you are.
It’s powerfully freeing, I promise.
Try it. (:
xx, Sista Christa
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